Rachel: I missed you.
Peter: You know, I actually wanted to tell you that I’ve been thinking so much about…
5:41 pm • 9 August 2009 • 166 notes
“He turned down a blow job from his ex-girlfriend… mid-blowjob. You know how hard that is for a man? It’s called blue balls. He’s like Gandhi! But better - he likes puppets!”
— Dwayne, Forgetting Sarah Marshall
4:40 pm • 9 August 2009 • 133 notes
“How you served five years under her, I don’t know. You deserve a medal, or a holiday or at least a cuddle from somebody. I would rather have my testicles spread out like a wafer and then have them covered in a layer of honey and then have wasps come and sting me and then have them covered in another layer of vinegar and then have it worn as a swimming cap by a Nazi. I’d rather have that than spend another second with her.”
— Aldous Snow, Forgetting Sarah Marshall
4:09 pm • 9 August 2009 • 178 notes
Aldous Snow: I mean, I’ve heard that women do fake orgasms, but I’ve never seen it… It really, deeply upsets me.
3:39 pm • 9 August 2009 • 138 notes